


In Which Steve Rogers Learns He's Pregnant

by skvsolo



Series: captain america comes down with a bad case of maternity [2]
Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Crying, F/M, Group Therapy, Knotting, Latino Tony Stark, Light Angst, M/M, Manly Tears, Mating Bond, Mpreg, Multi, Omega Steve, Pregnancy, Pregnancy sex, Sam Is a Good Friend, Vomiting, alpha bucky, bucky isn't around, canon typical discourse, not quite slow burn but Bucky takes a while to come home, peter is so hopeless, so so many manly tears, some schmoop, steve is panicking, sugary sweet reunion, tags will be updated as they happen, unbetad, whoops
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-23
Updated: 2017-08-14
Packaged: 2018-06-04 02:34:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 18
Words: 18,178
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6637855
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/skvsolo/pseuds/skvsolo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's been roughly ten weeks since Bucky fucked him senseless in some abandoned HYDRA facility.<br/>The team is getting tired of how moody he is.</p><p>Or, the life and times of Steve Rogers as he deals with an unplanned pregnancy, and Bucky Barnes discovering himself again</p><p>(nsfw warning for chapter 12.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

The pregnancy tests had been a joke.

Steve's been moody as hell for about a week, snapping at the team for minor offenses one minute, snorting in laughter with something someone said the next.

Darcy even walked in on him crying over a Disney movie once.

He'd been sitting in the commons, drawing something that was supposed to be sold in a charity auction, minding his own business when Tony threw them at him. He smiles, though, when he speaks.

"Saw those and thought of you. Been hormonal as hell, Rogers." He winks at him.

Steve gets offended, for a total of fifteen seconds. Then he remembers Bucky knotted him without protection something like two and a half months prior.

He suddenly feels very nauseous.

Before anyone can smell the distress on him, Steve is up and in the elevator, pressing the button to his floor.

His heart picks up, and he feels himself start to panic before he forces himself to calm down.

There's no need to panic. Nothing's for sure.

Twenty minutes later, he's at the nearest convenience store buying one of each kind of pregnancy test.

The girl behind the counter- a Beta- can't be older than seventeen.

Apparently the cap and glasses aren't as effective a disguise as they were at one point.

She squints at him as she takes his money, glances up at him as he counted.

"Hey- aren't you-"

"Captain America?"

She nods a little. Steve forces a laugh, rolls baby blues.

"Nah. I get that a lot, though."

"If you say so." She bags the tests- paper, per his request, slides the bag across the counter. "Should I say good luck?"

"I dunno."

And then he's gone, taking another drink of water from the bottle he's clutching between strong fingers.

Not long after that, Steve is biting his bottom lip, sitting on the edge of the bathtub, ten positive pregnancy tests staring up at him from the lid of the toilet.

Oh, _God_.

Oh, _Christ_.

That's ten for ten.

This is real. This is happening. Bucky's still on the run, still taking care of whatever it is he's doing. For all Steve knows, that could've been a break in the storm and he was still the Winter Soldier.

He notices the bouncing of his knee and the hand on his lower abdomen at the same. He moves the hand, puts it against his knee to still the vibrating. Nervous habit that's lasted the years.

Steve's always wanted kids. Wanted to give Bucky a whole baseball team of pups if that's what his Alpha wanted.

Nature had different plans though, giving him a body that was too weak and frail to even get through a good Heat, let alone carry a baby.

They'd tried so hard for so long. Bucky would take a couple days off work to help him with his Heat, knot him as often as he begged. And every time, his next Heat would come back to bite him in the ass.

Bucky told him he didn't mind. Even if they never ended up giving the Dodgers their new team, they'd adopt a dog or two and they'd be happy. They'd be together.

Steve saw the upset when he smelled an oncoming Heat instead of pups, though.

Erskine told him he had no clue if it would effect is fertility. He had asked about it, the night before, over their drinks. Steve has been thoroughly embarrassed as he struggled to get the words out, but the old Beta just smiled sadly.  The only other test subject- Schmidt- had been an Alpha. It wasn't like he would have stuck around for testing anyway. He told him to keep the faith, though. They'd do some discreet tests.

After he died, Steve forgot about it.

When he found Bucky again, he was on so many suppressants he barely smelled _Omega_.

When Bucky fell, Steve resigned himself to being 'Uncle Steve' to Bucky's sister's kids.

And when he was putting down that plane, he realized he wouldn't even be getting that.

But now it's 2016, and Steve Rogers is crying into the collar of his shirt.

It's broken, cracking sobs that tear into his throat and leave him hiccuping. There's snot flowing freely from his nose, and he reaches for toilet paper to wipe it away.

He's pregnant.

He's been putting his life in danger, and there's a whole little life growing inside him.

Being Captain America is gonna be put on the back burner for a while, he supposes.


	2. darcy is good for him

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Darcy helps Steve figure this out. She's the only one he thinks might have some sort of an idea on how to handle this... baby business.

Eventually, Steve gathers himself enough to pull himself up off of the edge of the bathtub. He leaves most of the tests on the toilet, shoves one in the pocket of his hoodie.

Darcy Lewis is his go-to for when he doesn't understand something. Her teasing is welcome, and she will listen to records or watch movies with him when he asks.

She's a friend he never expected to have.

She's also the Head of Omega Affairs for SHIELD.

No one is entirely sure how she got that title. Steve's half convinced she kicked someone out of their office and slapped a name tag on the door.

Her office is nice, though. It always smells like some wild array of flowers, there's always soft music playing from the speaker on her desk. Papers are everywhere, and there's a bulletin board on her wall filled with pamphlets for upcoming events, various support groups, a hotline or two. The room is decorated with easy colors, posters for bands she likes. And, of course, the magazine cover that caught a good picture of his ass while he was running.

She was certainly a character, Darcy Lewis.

She perks up when she sees him, straightens the papers she's doing before putting them to the side. "Steve! My main dude! What brings you to my humble abode?"

Steve forces a little smile, sits in the comfortable chair across from her desk. "I, uh," He clears his throat, pulls his lip between his teeth.

"You fuckin' stink, Steve. You can't tell me it's nothing this time, honey."

This smile is a little more genuine, but it fades when he twists the test between his fingers. He leans forward to place it on the desk in front of her. He wants to sink into the seat cushions while he watches her reaction.

"What the-" There's a few beats as Darcy turns the pink, plastic stick in her fingers, glances between Steve and the pink plus. "Steven Grant Rogers. You got _laid_ and you didn't _tell_ me?!"

Steve can't help but roll his eyes, hand pressed against his stomach again, still tucked into his hoodie pocket. He can't help the flick to the corner of his lips, either.

Darcy is good for him.

"You'll never guess who, either."

"Dude. If you've got, like, Thor's demigod spawn in your uterus, I will be so jealous."

Steve raises an eyebrow at her in response. "If I ever came within three feet of Thor's knot, you'd be the first to know."

She makes a finger gun at him, winks once. "Alright, if it's not him, then spill."

Steve glances back, uses one hand to lock the door behind him. "You can't.. You know. Yell. Or anything. Any kind of overreacting you might... Do, I guess."

"Steve, when have I ever overreacted?"

"Always, Darcy, literally always."

"Fair. Now, c'mon. Who popped a knot in America's Golden Boy?"

Steve leans forward, gives her the answer in a hushed murmur. He doesn't need that getting out, of all things.

"No. Way." She backs up slowly. "No _way_!" The Omega leaps from her rolling chair, paces the length of her office. "You got-" She hushes, slams her hands against the desk, leans in closer. "Knocked up by the _Winter Soldier_?" She laughs, resumes her pacing.

Steve had been expecting this. "You done?"

"You've got a-" Darcy motions to him, specifically his abdomen, and Steve curls up a little. "Inside you and it's _Bucky Barnes_ '?! Ooh, I need to sit down."

"Please do. And here I thought I was panicking."

She sits back in her chair, legs crossed over each other like she's a child eagerly awaiting a story. "Details. Right now." Apparently, she is.

Steve feels comfortable telling Darcy his story, even the x-rated part. Never did he think he would be sitting in a pastel office with a blown up poster of his ass, telling a hyperactive woman his sexual escapes.

"That explains the crying over Lady and the Tramp, then, huh?"

" _Listen_ , Darcy, the dog _died_ , okay? I'm gonna start crying again if you don't hush."

The other Omega snorts a laugh at him as she picks up the test again, flicks the little pink plus twice. Steve _almost_ hopes it changes everything.

"So. You're definitely preggers."

"The other nine tests in my bathroom can attest to that."

Darcy chews on her cheek as she thinks, twists the plastic between her fingers. "You know this means, like. Baby doctors and stuff, yeah? No more Captain America-ing?" She gasps. "No more movie drinking games!"

Steve is relieved when those words leave her mouth. Though, he has to admit, he'll miss it. "You had be worried for a second there. Thought there may have been a genuine crises." He runs a hand through the hair on the back of his head, scratches his neck. "I thought about all that, yeah."

"You know I gotta ask, big bear," She stops. Licks her lips. "Are you gonna keep it?"

This gives Steve pause. _That_ , of all things, he hadn't thought about. "I..."

"You don't have to answer right away, Steve,"

"I do."

"Or do. You wanna keep the pup? As your baby, or up for adoption?"

Steve wrestles with his words for a moment, eyebrows creased. "It's an option. For some Omegas, sure. Abortion and adoption and all that, they can do what they need to to make themselves happy," Steve clears his throat, stomach rolling again. "I can't do that. Can't give up finally having a chance to have my family. Even if Buck wants no part of it."

He must be looking a little green, Because Darcy lifts her little personal trash can from the side of her desk and motions for Steve to take it. He holds the purple metal to his chest tight enough to dent it slightly.

"Then we'll set up a doctor's appointment, yeah? You comfortable with going civilian, or do you wanna do it SHIELD?"

Steve doesn't have think on it too hard. "Is Bruce in?"

Darcy has to think for a moment before she checks something on her computer.

"Yeah. Is that his kind of science, though?"

Steve shrugs, swallows hard. "I mean.. I don't know. He's who I trust with this, though."

"Alright then, big bear, let's go bug Doctor Banner and break the news."

This should be interesting.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve and Darcy enlist one Bruce Banner to the cause.

"What you're telling me here is," Bruce pauses, pulls latex gloves from his hands, drops them into the trash before fixing his glasses. "That you're pregnant," He gives a pointed look at Steve. "And it's Bucky's baby?"

Steve clears his throat before nodding. What are the chances of the hoodie swallowing him whole?

"Okay. I don't need context." The Beta pinches the bridge of his nose and sighs, taking off his glasses to run a hand over his face. "And you're coming to me with this because..?" He trails off, wanting one of the two of them to answer.

Steve beats Darcy to it.

"You're the only one I trust with this," His hand is moving to his stomach of his own accord at this point. "With-" He swallows hard. "My, uh. Baby."

Bruce goes a little softer around the edges, smiles at him before leading him and Darcy to another room- cleaner, closer to an office. There's no blown up photos of his ass. It's nice.

"You know, I'm not exactly a prenatal doctor, Steve."

"I know. I just-" His hands twist into the cuffs of his sleeves. "I don't know what do here. I can't go civilian, because if this gets out- that I'm pregnant- innumerable sources could use this against me. I'd be putting my baby at risk before they even weigh a pound." Something about referring to the baby as 'it' makes him uncomfortable. So he doesn't. "And I've learned not to trust people easily. And when it comes to the care of my baby- even in-utero- I'm going to be even less likely to do just that. So. There's that."

He's not sure when he started pacing, but here he comes to a stop, leaning heavily on the back of the chair that was offered to him. The nausea is back. Darcy puts it upon herself to grab Bruce's waist basket and put it in the seat of the chair.

"Here you go, big bear,"

"Thank you," He barely noticed the slight sway, how one hand moves to cover his mouth.

"Steve... I'll help you as much as I can, okay?"

His smile is warm. Steve believes him.

"I'll have to consult some other doctors- bring in maybe one person to help here. The most I've ever done with babies is deliver a handful in third world countries."

Steve very suddenly realizes he will be going into labor, and pushing a baby out of his body.

Bruce's waist basket gets some use.

Darcy rubs his back and holds his hoodie strings. She's infinitely more gentle than when he's vomiting after a night of drinking with her. It's weird. He isn't sure if he enjoys that.

"Delivery is still a long way off, Steve, it's alright," Bruce brings him a glass of water and a box of tissues to clean up with, pats his shoulder. "How far along do you think you are?"

Steve does the math in his head as he swallows a drink of water. "Sorry about your trash can." His voice is embarrassingly shaky. "I'm.. I'm ten weeks and five days."

"Oh. You know exactly, then? That's good." Bruce smiles gently at him from where he's leaning on his desk, completely disregards the trash can. He'll handle it later. "A healthy pregnancy is between thirty-eight and forty-two weeks. Which means you're gonna be holding your baby any time between mid December and early January."

Steve nods slowly, tries to wrap his head around the situation, still. He's going to be holding a baby- _his_ baby in less than a year. He and Bucky are gonna have a little boy or girl.

He hopes Bucky wants to stick around. Oh- _Christ_ , he has to tell Bucky.

"In about a week and a half, I'll be able to tell you sex, and if it's multiples."

Steve stiffens, eyes going wide.

Darcy, who's been surprisingly quiet, coughs once. "Yeah- I dunno, maybe avoid the 'm' word until it becomes a reality. One baby is enough of a shit storm for now."

Steve leans into the touch when she scoots closer to him.

"Sorry. Sorry. Please, no panicking, I think the trash can is full," Bruce offers him that same warm smile, runs a hand through curly hair. "I'll get my hands on some equipment, okay? An ultra sound and such,"

Darcy helps him up. It isn't necessary, but it's welcomed.

 "Thank you, Doctor Banner." Steve tries to hold his head some kind of high as he extends his hand for a shake. Bruce takes his hand, stands from the desk.

"Any time, Captain. You can call me Bruce, though, really. I don't mind."

"Okay. All the same. Thank you, for agreeing to help. It means more than you can imagine."

They trade a few more words before Steve and Darcy are back in the elevator.

She looks up at him, blows a breath out her nose.

"Now what?"

"I was hoping you'd know."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> bucky is gonna show up soon i promise  
> also im hoping as i get more comfortable, chapters will get longer


	4. darcy is a good friend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> darcy does her best  
> steve is pretty sure he'd be in love with her if she could pop a knot.

"So... I'm not saying that you need to tell Bucky, but," Darcy looks over her laptop at him, blue eyes meeting his. "You need to find some way to tell Bucky."

Steve groans, one hand over his face, rubbing at his eyes. "Yes, dear, I know this. You think My first thought wasn't Bucky? That I didn't want him there waiting on the tests with me?"

"Hey now, there's no need to get moody at me, big bear. I'm just saying."

Steve pulls his knees close to his chest, thinks about how he won't be able to do that sooner rather than later. "'M sorry. I just get pissy at the drop of a hat."

"I know this. And I still love you. Imagine that." She teases, nudging him with her socked foot. "Now, I'm looking up baby stuff to learn what I need to know as someone who's practically a midwife at this point, and," She scrolls once, fixes her glasses. "Did you know your baby's only about this big right now?" She holds up her forefinger and thumb about an inch and a half apart.

Steve has _erasers_ bigger than that.

"Nu-uh. Lemme see."

She spins the laptop so he can examine the screen. The tab says something about babies and ten weeks, but Steve doesn't really focus on that, too busy looking at the picture of the fetus in front of him.

"That's inside me right now?"

She smiles as she nods, making another vague motion toward his stomach. "This little alien lookin' thing has made a home in your uterus, Steve. It only really starts looking like a baby at sixteen weeks." She tells him, flips the computer back toward herself to pull up a picture to show him. "It's about the size of an avocado then."

Steve reaches out to touch the screen gently, he isn't sure why.

He recoils when Darcy looks at him like she's just seen a puppy for the first time.

"Shut up." He stands, making his way to his kitchen. He's not sure if he's too hungry, but he needs to occupy his hands.

"I didn't even say anything!"

"You were thinking. I didn't like it." Steve can hear the smile in his own voice as he pilfers through his fridge. "You hungry?"

"Famished! Did you know you'll be able to feel your baby move in, like, three weeks?"

Steve only hums in reply. He comes back with two bowls of cereal, and they talk about something other than babies for a while.

It doesn't last long.

Steve's got the tip of the spoon in his mouth, half of his bowl of cereal abandoned on the arm of the sofa, fingers curling into the fabric over the area he figures his uterus is. "I don't even know how to get a hold of him." He feels sick again, and moves the cereal to the coffee table, curls into himself once more. "It's entirely possible he won't show up again for a long time, Darcy." Is he crying? Oh, God, he's crying. "There's no way he'll be there for the first ultrasound. What if he misses the first time the baby moves? Darcy- what if he misses his baby boy or girl being born?"

Darcy's bowl is next to his, and she pulls the big Omega down to her chest, holding her close. She knows the heart beat will ease him, at least a little. "Don't get yourself all worked up about something that's not even happened yet, okay?" Her lips are warm when she kisses the top of his head. "If he misses any big events after the ultrasound, I'm gonna go get him myself and drag him back here by the ear so he can be here for the rest."

Steve gives a watery laugh. He feels pathetic, tucked against her breasts like this. It reminds him of when he was a kid, just like this with his own mother.

"Real talk, though, big bear, I'm here. I'll let you break my hands to hold yours if you gotta. Who needs an Alpha, anyway? Us Omegas gotta stick together."

"God, I love you."

"I love you too, old man. You still feeling sick and anxious?"

"A little."

"You wanna cuddle some more?" "Yeah."

\---

Darcy ended up spending the night on his couch.

They watched some random movies on Netflix- steered clear of sappy romance flicks. Steve was pretty sure he'd end up sobbing in her arms. He gets up to throw up twice during the night, the second just some water and a lot of dry heaving. Darcy was there to clean up and run his back.

"If only you were an Alpha. I'd be so damn in love with you."

Darcy snorted, got him a glass of water and sent him off to bed. "I'm a joy. I know. Good night, Steve."

The next morning, he gets up slowly. Feels heavy. He sighs, rolling out of bed and feeling... sluggish. When he reaches down to grab his toothbrush, he's vaguely confused when he holds a baby blue plastic device instead.

"What the hell is-" Steve yelps, taking two big steps from the sink, throwing the pregnancy test back onto the sink. His back his the wall and he sinks to the floor, swallowing deep breaths as memories come through the early morning fog. "Barely as big as my thumb and you're already causing me all kinds of trouble." He murmurs, though his words are soft as the touch to his bare skin.

His apartment is empty when he finally walks out of the bathroom. He wonders where Darcy has gone for a few moments before his stomach growls at him and he sets himself up another bowl of cereal.

It feels weird being alone for the first time in days.

He eats his cereal slowly, can't help but smile when the door opens Darcy's voice fills his apartment.

"Okay, so, I'm back!" She had a shoebox on her hip, and Steve lifts an eyebrow at her. "Now, none of these are mandatory, of course, big bear." She places a coffee in front of him (a big check mark over decaf) and starts putting pamphlets out on the table. "I've decided group will be good for you. You're a giant emotional beacon, big bear, and when you really get raging I'm not sure if I can handle this alone."

Steve lifts an eyebrow at her, leans forward to pick up a bright pink pamphlet with the words 'Everyday Mom: Just Needing Some Support' across it in delicate white cursive. "Anything about my situation seem everyday?"

Darcy squints at that one before putting it in a separate pile. "That one can go up on the board. I just grabbed anything that yelled 'maternity' at me."

Steve snorts a laugh as he rolls his eyes, watching her put out an array of the glossy papers.

There's a good fifteen, and Steve can't imagine there's enough causes for each of their individual groups. One catches his eye, though. His fingers reach forward to grab it, pull it toward himself. "Abuse, rape, and war survivors, hm?" It's put a little more delicately on the title. "PTSD Maternity Group. One for fighters." He cracks it open, glances through the pages.

Darcy sits across from him, coffee in her hands. "I thought you might take a liking to that one. Doesn't exactly scream 'butterfly growing in your happy place.'"

He laughs at that, turns to the back flap to find the days and times of the meetings, "There's a meeting tomorrow. At five." Steve chews on it for a moment, looking up at Darcy over the flyer. "I hope you know I won't be going alone."

She gets up to squeeze his shoulder, leans to kiss his temple. "Of course not, big bear. You've got me glued to your hip for the rest of my life."

Steve tilts his head to knock theirs together affectionately, a gentle smile on his face. He can't imagine it any other way at this point.


	5. steve discovers group

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> steve goes to group therapy. peter helps him figure a thing or two out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> mentions of rape and abuse in this chapter just fyi

Steve glances up at the building, swallowing thickly. Darcy squeezes his hand.

"You don't have to do this."

"It'll be worse if I don't try."

She grins up at him, fixes his cap and glasses, adjusts his jacket. "Alright. Let's go get 'em, tiger."

"I thought I was a bear?"

"Oh my." She rolls her warm blue eyes, ushers him into the building.

They arrived ten minutes early. The room is dimly lit, feels... soft around the edges. It's by no means Everyday Mom, though.

The building had been something akin to dirty, but this room is nice. The walls are a soft amber color, the carpet is a short, stiff kind. It's white with various splashes of color.

There's three people in the chairs, two placing food items on a table at the side of the room. His palms start to sweat. Should he have brought something?

A woman- roughly thirty, strong build, dark short cropped hair, Vietnamese- is speaking gently between people. She has an eyepatch over her left eye, a scar extending from it. Her left leg is prosthetic.

A group for fighters.

She notices him after she pats the man on the shoulder, walks toward him with a warm smile. "I don't believe we've seen you around here," She offers her hand for a shake. "I'm Chien Vong, I set this group up." She has a hint of an accent.

Steve shakes her hand with a tight smile. "Steve. It's good to meet you, Ma'am."

"Always good to have new faces." If she recognizes him, she doesn't let it show. She introduces herself to Darcy as well.

"Oh! It's nice to meet you!" She shakes her hand, grins at her. "I'm Darcy. AKA moral support for my friend here." She pats Steve's chest. He struggles with not rolling his eyes.

"Friends are welcome here, Darcy. Encouraged, even. I know group is hard." She excuses herself to greet a few other people, and Steve takes his seat in an uncomfortable plastic chair. He imagines the more heavily pregnant people will need the more comfortable ones.

Darcy sits in a metal foldable beside him, scoots it closer so he can grab her hand or something if he needs to. In the few minutes before the meeting starts, the room fills up. Steve tries not to start when a boy who can't be older than seventeen sits beside him, belly bigger than he could imagine someone of his stature could handle. Chien smiles at him and waves. He does the same.

"Okay." She starts, looks around the circle they have. Steve does, too. It's an odd group of people. "As always, it's good to see familiar faces. Even better to see new ones reaching out." She gives a look to Steve, and he's given a handful of smiles. He returns with a tight one of his own. "Does anyone volunteer to start us off today? As most of you know, it doesn't have to be about your past or your babies. We're just here to talk."

A skinny brunet from across the room starts to speak. Steve could swear he recognizes their voice. "Hey guys. Peter. I just... have a question, really?" He clears his throat, swallows hard. "Is it worth it? The settling down, the babies, the letting someone know how fucked up you are?"

There's a couple laughs, a couple warm smiles. Steve decides to take a seat on this one. The heavily pregnant Omega beside him answers first.

"It depends entirely on how comfortable you are with the person you're talking about." He runs a hand over the side of his stomach, smiles softly at Peter. "I mean... When this first happened to me, I was horrified. I was having pups after being raped. No one would ever want me like this." There's a big bonding mark on his neck. Steve feels a little sick again. "Of course I was scared. I didn't want anyone near me. Especially when I learned I was carrying triplets." That explains some things. "But, eventually, I met Olivia. Most of you know her. She wouldn't let me push her away. Turns out she's just what I needed. She's gonna be good to our babies. Even if that asshole sired them, that doesn't make him their father. She'll be a great dad." He winces, Steve can very clearly see a little hand press up against his skin. "It just depends on how badly you want to be okay with someone, Pete. If you're okay on your own, it's okay to stay that way a little longer. If you want someone, make sure they know you and your struggles before hand. Because I know I wouldn't even be close to ready for these babies without my Alpha."

Everyone is quiet for a moment. The person on the other side of him reaches out to touch his arm.

A few more stories are shared from different standpoints, and Steve suddenly feels very out of his element. He wasn't raped. He didn't lose a baby. He wasn't abused. He was just an old war vet who was struggling a little. It was nothing compared to there people.

He murmurs something about the bathroom to Darcy as he slips up and out.

Steve leans against the wall, hand over the thin shirt to rest over his belly. He feels sick, feels like he might cry. Feels fucking ridiculous for coming here when these people were suffering so much worse than him.

He tilts his head back against the wall, closes his eyes to take a few deep breaths. He isn't sure how long he's out there, but eventually there's a voice clearing it's throat.

Steve snaps his eyes open, looks down at the lanky Omega. He recognizes him as Peter from earlier.

"You looked a little rough. I thought I'd come see if you were okay."

Steve forces a nearly bitter chuckle, free hand taking his hat and tucking it under his arm so he can run a hand through light hair. "Thanks."

"I'm Peter, by the way." He leans against the opposite wall. He can't be older than twenty. Steve sizes him up for a moment, glad he didn't extend a hand. He's a little on edge, doesn't want to touch anyone new.

"Steve."

"Nice to make your acquaintance, Steve." Peter smiles up at him, and he can't help but return it. "You feel guilty, don't you?"

"What?"

"For being here. They've all got it so bad, and you feel out of place?" When he doesn't answer for a moment, Peter smiles again and nods. "Yeah. I felt the same for the first couple of meetings I came to. They're here to help you. Even if you're just figuring things out, they're a good group to do it with. I promise, they won't kick you out for not having a tragic backstory."

Steve laughs a little. "My back story is plenty tragic." He glances back to the room. "Just not in the same fashion as theirs, I guess."

Peter offers him a stick of gum. He politely refuses. The brunet watches him for a moment as he chews. "You don't have to speak. Don't even have to tell them your name if you don't want to. You can just be a quiet observer. Just know you're safe here and all. We've got a room full of war vets and street fighters. No matter what happens, it's a safe place."

Steve chooses to believe him.

They return to the room together, and Darcy leans against him as they listen quietly. 

No one asks him to speak. 

He prefers it that way. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> things will start actually happening soon i promise


	6. steve discovers dildos

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this is really just some comedic relief before I make things all emotional

Things are quiet for a few days. Steve cries. He pukes. He goes to another meeting. Sam comes to see him once, but other than that he's spending all his time with Darcy.

He does experience, though, waking up wet and aching with pregnancy hormones for the first time.

His hands do the job but it's rather unsatisfying. After he takes a long shower he marches into Darcy's office, slams his hands on the desk.

"I need to get my hands on a knotting dildo. Right now."

She blinks up at him twice before busting into laughter, fixing her glasses as it dies into giggles. "Jesus Christ. This is not how I thought I'd be spending my day." Darcy wipes at her under eye, and Steve frowns. "Sit down, big bear. I gotta finish this sexual harassment report, and then we'll work on your horny situation."

Steve sits in the chair across from her desk. He crosses his legs- left over right- knee shaking impatiently. "Do you have any-"

She hands him the bowl of M&Ms without looking.

He'd developed a hankering for them two days prior.

He takes the bowl with a quiet thanks, picks out the red ones and pops a few into his mouth. What? It's a pretty color.

It takes her five minutes to finish the papers, putting them in the outbox. "Alright. Now," She giggles again, fingers pausing over her laptop's keyboard. "Are you looking for just any old knotting dildo? Or do you wanna customize it to be like Bucky's?"

Steve chokes on his M&M. "You can do that?"

Darcy blinks at him slowly, pulls a hair tie from her wrist to tie her hair back. "Oh, honey," She almost looks pitiful. "Have you only been using your hands since you got back?"

Steve's face lights up. "They've worked just fine until now."

Darcy clicks her tongue, shakes her head as she types. "Steve Rogers, you have so much to learn. I know you don't like splurging, but you're gonna, and you're gonna get a nice fake Barnes Dick for yourself." She hands him the laptop and he flushes even deeper at the site that she's pulled up.

Of course there's customizable dildos. It's the 21st century.

The Omega blows hair from his eyes, sighs a little at all the options. "What even are these materials?"

"Go with silicone. It's trusty." She's gone back to her paperwork.

"Yes ma'am." She snorts. He keeps scrolling. "Why. Darcy- why can I get it in seriously any color? There's a _color wheel_."

"Because some people like to have _fun_ , Gramma. My favorite vibrator happens to be pink and has little heart on it."

"Fuckin' wild." Steve murmurs the words, looking up as he tries to picture, well, Bucky's dick. It's not too hard. "Okay, but this is pretty neat. You can even choose the knot diameter?" There's a little display on the side of the screen, showing his creation so far. "And the level of vein-age and stuff? As an artist, I can appreciate this."

Darcy laughs with him as she fixes her glasses again. "Mm-hmm. As an artist. Totally not as someone who woke up needing a knot."

"That, too." It takes something like twenty minutes before he's finished, handing the laptop back to her.

She puts her signature on the final paper, only looking at the screen when she wheels back around. She nearly falls from her seat. "Jesus Christ!"

Steve's blush is back.

"You've had that thing _in your ass_?" She's overreacting. "When you were 5'4 and as big as my _pinkie_? On a good day?" She's making this really hard on him.

"Yes, now could we keep the yelling to a minimum? You're making me want to crawl in a hole."

"Yeah, and you're making me want to go back to 1935 to meet an Alpha that's packing this."

Steve laughs this time. "Darcy. Just- place the order, will you? Fastest delivery possible. If you will." With that, he kisses her head, takes a handful of M&Ms, and leaves for his apartment.

When it comes in the mail two days later, Darcy doesn't see him for three.

She sends him the occasional text to remind him of food, and water, and bathing.


	7. oh baby

Bruce calls him two weeks after their first appointment, just like he said. Got his hands on an ultrasound machine, found someone he trusted to handle this. They wouldn't be there today, but they'd help him through a lot of this.

Steve is laying on a make-shift bed, chewing on his lip impatiently. Really, it's a lab table with a couple blankets and a couch cushion under his head. His arm is tucked under his neck, propping his head up to look at the dark screen. The lights have been dimmed, and Darcy is holding his hand so tightly it almost hurts.

Somewhere in the back of his mind, he wishes she was Bucky.

"This is gonna be cold, okay?"

Steve lifts an eyebrow. "I spent seventy years in the Arctic. I think I can handle some cold goop."

Bruce's smile is almost embarrassed. It is cold, though.

Steve sucks in a breath as the wand is placed to his lower abdomen. He doesn't realize he's holding it until Bruce makes a triumphant little sound and he points to the screen.

"Look- there's your baby, Steve!"

Very suddenly and all at once, Steven Grant Rogers is crying. No broken sobs this time, but there are definitely fat tears streaming across his skin and his voice waves when he finally speaks. "Holy shit."

"Oh, Steve," Darcy will admit to anyone that she's tearing up, too. She's grinning all big and bright and Steve is glad she's there.

Bruce flicks a switch on the back of the monitor, and Steve lets out a single sob at the sound of his baby's heart beat. "Lucky you, Steve, the big 'M' word doesn't apply. You've just got one pup growing inside you."

Steve can't take his eyes off the monitor. They're the most beautiful thing he's ever laid his eyes on.

"Do you want to know the sex? Or keep is a surprise for now?"

Steve thinks on it for a moment. "I want Bucky to be here when we find out." He answers, and Bruce's smile gets a little softer.

"Yeah. Yeah, Steve, of course. It'll be a nice surprise. I'll go ahead and print some of these off for you."

"Hey, Bruce! I-" The door is open, then, and panic hits Steve like a train as he looks over, finds Tony bursting into the lab with his mouth open.

Brown eyes flicker between Steve, the wand in Bruce's hand, and the monitor for several moments. "No fuckin' way."

Steve throws his arm over his eyes and groans. He'd been aiming to put off this conversation for a while yet.

\---

Tony is pacing the length of the lab, trying to wrap his head around this situation. "You- _Barnes_ \- you've got _Barnes' spawn_ inside you?"

Steve bristles at that. " _Spawn_?" He nearly growls the word, hand on his lower belly, fist at his side. "I've got the love of my life's _baby_ inside me, yeah-"

"You've got the _Winter Soldier's_ baby inside of you. You don't even know if Bucky is ever coming back."

Steve nearly throws a goddamn punch, but Darcy is between them, making him sit back down, and making Tony back up. "Both of you just shut up!" She huffs, and tucks lose hair behind her ear. "Steve, you can't go picking fights with everyone that has a negative stance on what Bucky's done. I _know_ he didn't willingly do it- will you just let me finish my thing? Thank you. You're going to be facing a lot of shit like this and worse. But you're pregnant. You're going to have to take a seat sometimes." She turns to Tony. He visibly shrinks. "And _you_!" Darcy pokes at his chest, hands on her hips. "Can you not take a locked door for what it is?" Tony tries to say something, but she hushes him. "Steve was holding off from telling you for this reason exactly! Stop acting like he's got a _demon_ inside him and realize how happy this has made him!" She makes a motion to the tear stains on her shirt. "He knows Bucky's past. But he believes he has a future. You needed someone like that, too, at one point."

The room is so quiet they can hear the ultrasound machine hum. Bruce flicks it off, and they're plunged into total silence besides the sound of their own breathing. Obviously, that hit home.

"Now. Steve. Apologize."

"But-"

" _Steve_."

Steve frowns, crosses his arms like a petulant child. "I'm sorry I yelled." She gives him a look and he scoffs. "I'm sorry I'm so touchy, Tony."

"Better. Now your turn."

"Darcy, this-"

" _Tony_."

The shorter Omega groans, pinches the bridge of his nose. "I'm sorry I called your baby a spawn. And Bucky hopeless."

"Good. Now discuss this and what it means for your team like the full grown adults you are."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> gotta love me some momma darcy


	8. im not clever enough for this

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> steve tells the gang

Steve goes about telling every one on his own. Darcy would like to be there for them, but she has things to do.

He tells Sam while they're on a run. He's too quiet, and the Alpha gets suspicious. When they slow to a stop to let Sam catch his breath, Steve clears his throat.

"I'm pregnant."

Samuel Wilson chokes on his water. It comes spraying out his nose, and Steve laughs so hard Sam thinks he's joking.

"You're fuckin' with me."

"Nope. You remember that base? The one where I was gone for, like, four hours?" Steve clears his throat again, scratches the back of his neck.

"You were getting _laid_ , and you didn't tell your _therapist_? Oh, buddy, I'm hurt." Sam nudges him with his elbow, and they finish their run. That may have been the easiest one.

Clint... Doesn't take it badly. But Steve does surprise him with it.

They're taking bets on who's the better shot. Clint is all high and mighty, because they both know Steve's no good with a gun, let alone a bow.

They draw back, aiming for their respective targets.

"Get ready to pull out twenty bucks, Rogers."

Steve hums, waits until the exact minute he's about to release before he drops the words. "I'm pregnant."

Steve hits the fourth ring on the target. Clint's arrow hits the wall with a loud thwack.

"Cap- that's a dirty ass trick! That's no fair." He shuts up when Steve shows him the ultrasound. "Oh, shit."

Steve snorts, leaning on the counter, hands against it. "Yeah."

"How far along?"

"Thirteen weeks."

"Oh, you've hit the first trimester." He nods, clears his throat as he hands the picture back. "Can I-"

"Bucky. Bucky's the father."

Clint blinks at him, doesn't say anything for a moment. "Context. Right now."

Steve is getting used to telling the vague details of this story by this point.

"Cap. Cap that is literally a tawdry romance plot. Please pardon my laughter."

Steve laughs with him.

Thor is overjoyed. Like. Picks him up and spins him around and kisses him on the forehead.

"Congratulations, Captain! I'm sure the babe will grow strong like it's mother."

Steve laughs a little awkwardly, glad to have been put down after that hug. Thor's a good guy. Just... A little easily excited.

Jane is with him and she nearly squeals, wraps her arms around his neck. "Oh, Steve! I'm so happy for you! All that babysitting of Astrid should come in handy now, huh?" Their little girl is three years old, and Steve loved her to bits. He hadn't thought of that, though.

"Huh. I suppose you're right."

Jane winks at him. "I usually am."

Scott and Hope are newer to the team, but he lives here and they're together pretty frequently. Steve trusts them. They deserve to know why he's going to be out of commission for a while.

"You have to understand that what I'm about to tell you can't go public. Under any circumstances."

"Yeah, Cap, of course. I don't have that much of a mouth on me."

Hope makes an incredulous noise. Scott giggles when he tells her to hush.

Steve smiles at the interaction. They seem happy.

"I, ah. I'm going on maternity leave. So."

Scott breaks into a grin as he claps him on the arm. "Oh, man! Congrats! I know Cassie being born was the best day of my whole life."

Hope gives him a smile and a nod. "I'm happy for you. Best of luck, Captain."

Steve leaves Natasha for last on damn purpose. She's a good friend. But she's a scary friend. And Steve doesn't know how she'll handle babies.

He finds her in her apartment just after a mission, toweling her hair dry, sweats on. She looks comfortable. That's new.

"Hey, Steve. Come on in." Post workout is always a good time to catch Natasha. She's a lot easier to talk to at that point. "You thirsty? I picked up some vodka on my time over in Russia. Thought I'd give you a taste of what it should taste like, instead of that fruity lighter fluid you enjoy so much."

Steve laughs awkwardly, scratches the back of his neck. "Nah. I don't think so. Not for a couple months, at least."

"You trying a new cleanse or something? Darcy push you into that?" She lifts a perfectly manicured eyebrow, pours herself a glass of the liquor. The smell of it makes him go a little green.

"No, nah, nothing like that." Steve fiddles with a decoration on the counter of her bar to occupy his hands.

"Alright. What's up, Steve? You smell weird."

Steve waits until she's taken her drink to drop that bomb. "You know how I found Bucky a couple months back?"

"Yessir."

"He, uh. Knotted me. And now I'm pregnant."

She doesn't skip a beat before she lifts her glass again and downs the rest of the clear liquid, pours another. "I feel like now is an apt time to tell you that he and I slept together."

It's Steve's turn to take a pause. "What?"

"When he was still Winter. He didn't even know who he was, let alone you."

Steve clears his throat. For a moment, he thinks about taking that drink anyway.

"It didn't mean anything, if that helps at all. Just... Two Alphas fighting for dominance and ending up in... a pile."

"It's okay." The Omega smiles tightly, nods at her. It's certainly a tough pill to swallow. He understands. "Really. I do appreciate you telling me."

"Are you about to throw up?"

"Yep." And he does, directly into her kitchen sink. He tries to clean it up, but she won't let him. She must feel bad.

"I'm happy for you Steve, really." Nat speaks over the sink, spraying the vomit down into the garbage disposal before flicking it on. "Does James know?"

Steve still feels a little sick. "No. I haven't seen him- ah!"

Steve Rogers nearly leaps ten feet into the air as he feels the first flutter of movement inside him.

"What- Steve- what's wrong?"

His laugh is as watery as his words when he speaks. "The baby. They just moved. For the first time." It feels like a little fish swimming around in his uterus, and he puts a hand over his mouth at an attempt to stop the sob that follows. The amount of tears he has shed recently is frankly embarrassing.

Natasha just squeezes his shoulder and smiles up at him.

He's glad she's here with him for this.


	9. steve opens up

Steve goes to his next meeting by himself. The boy who sits next to him- Al, he leaned- isn't there. Chien announces it's because he went into labour early last night. Steve is happy for him. Those pups were beating him up.

It's week fourteen, and Steve is starting to notice the peeing. It's already getting obnoxious. He now totally understands why their meeting room is the closest one to the bathroom.

Steve isn't sure why, but he feels like he needs to talk. When Chien asks for a volunteer, Steve raises his hand like he's back in seventh grade. Her smile is sweet when she tells him to go ahead.

"Ah... Hi. I'm Steve." He gets some kind waves. Peter beams at him from across the room. "As I'm sure you all could guess, this baby was by no means... planned." He laughs a little, knee starting to shake. One of the others notices, and she pipes with a 'none of them were'. Steve's laugh is more awkward than he wants. "I, uh. I went overseas sometime back," He starts, tries to figure out how not to lie to these people. "My Mate was in my unit." Omega soldiers weren't so rare anymore. The lack of surprise is still odd. "We... Lost him. He was declared killed in action." Steve swallows thickly, hand moving over his belly. Darcy says he should start showing soon. "I got reckless. Got involved in an attack that put me in a coma for a long time." He hopes they understand the vagueness as him not wanting to talk about it too much. "I woke up and he- he was still gone," Jesus, Steve, do _not_ tear up. Don't do it. You're doing it. "I tried to bounce back. Tried to be my own person without him. It was just- I was struggling. For a really, really long time." Steve uses the heel of his palm on his free hand to rub at his eye. "A couple of years ago, though, someone found him. Turns out he was a PoW." The Omega laughs again, but his voice shakes. "He- he came back," Steve chews on his bottom lip for a moment. He can't recall really talking about this before now. Maybe it'll be good for him. "He came to see me. It triggered a Heat. He fucked me senseless, and I thought he might come home. But I woke up alone. I woke up alone, and-" His fingers curl into the fabric of his shirt. "And he doesn't even know. He doesn't even know he has a little son or a baby girl. I have no way of telling him, either." He isn't sure when the tears started really falling. He isn't sure when he felt comfortable enough around these people to cry in front of them.

Peter stands from his spot next to Chien, sits where Darcy usually does. Steve appreciates the gesture, especially when he knocks their knees together.

Chien looks sad when she speaks. "You obviously loved him very much, Steve. I'm really sorry this happened to you. He could come back, still. Maybe he just needed time to figure himself out." Little does she know how right she is.

Steve just nods. Peter hands him a tissue.

He doesn't speak the rest of the meeting. He realizes, though, he feels that same lightness he did after he found Bucky. After it's over, he's grabbing his Tupperware container of cookies and shoving them into his backpack. People are still speaking quietly amongst themselves, and Steve doesn't mind being alone.

"Can I interest you in a Subway lunch?" Peter's voice startles the hell out of him, but he snorts a laugh at he throws his backpack over his shoulder. "I've got a gift card. Nothing funky, I just wanna talk."

Steve lifts his eyebrow at him, and he thinks on it for a minute before nodding.

The walk to the subway is awkward.

The picking at their sandwiches is more so.

"So... What was it you had in mind?"

"You look like you're good at giving advice, and I'm dying here." Peter, apparently, had been waiting for that one. "I'm not... Pregnant. I don't think. I've never gone through a miscarriage, had a stillborn, been raped, none of that. I started going as moral support for my friend Harry. He was abused a lot as a kid. He was just reaching out for help. He found it there, but... Things happened. He stopped coming." Peter clears his throat, shrugs his shoulder. "They're a good group of people. We try to help, but we're all a little fucked up. So. I don't know."

Steve puts his water back on the table, chin resting on the palm of his hand. "Wanna ask for your advice? You look like a fish out of water."

Peter laughs, obviously a little embarrassed, pokes at a piece of lettuce that's fallen out of his sandwich. "How do I tell two Alphas fighting over me that I love them both? Like. I wanna have both their babies and, yet, I am still alone during Heats."

Steve hums, popping a pickle into his mouth and chewing slowly. Some foods he used to love had to be thrown out of his diet because the baby didn't agree. He used to hate pickles, too. Now look at him. This baby is fucking him up in all kinds of ways. "We're going with the honesty card."

Peter groans, leans back in the hard plastic chair, hands over his face. "That was the worst advice."

Steve laughs around another pickle, hand covering his mouth. "What? You asked for my advice and I gave it!"

Peter spreads his fingers to give him a look. "You want me. To propose polyamory. To two knotheads."

Steve shrugs a broad shoulder. glances up as the door opens. Back to the door wasn't his forte anymore. "Would you rather pick between the two of them?"

Peter grumbles something Steve doesn't catch, poking at that poor shredded lettuce again.

"Stop playing with your food and eat it."

Peter glances behind himself, a hand on his chest. "I'm sorry, _what_? Are you sure you're a first time parent?" Even Steve had been surprised a little by that his own words.

"Whatever. Don't mock me. You just look like you need to eat," He bullshits, takes another drink of his water. He pulls at his collar, feels a little hot under it. He's suddenly very uncomfortable, and just wants to be cuddled up with a blanket at home.

Peter checks his watch, wraps up his sandwich and shoves it in his bag. "I'll propose polyamory, okay?" He says, smiles at Steve. "I've got to get to class now, though. I'll see you next week, okay?"

Steve forces a smile. He thinks, for a moment, the pickles might make another appearance.

Steve does the same with his sandwich, drinks his water as he walks home, the warmth on his skin and the nausea remaining persistent. He'll have to ask Darcy if hot flashes are another pregnancy symptom.


	10. poor baby

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> why do i keep torturing steve tbh

By the time he gets home, Steve feels like he just might be dying.

He grabs a couple extra blankets from the linen closet, sets up in the dark of his closet, curled up and whimpering. He turned down the thermostat, but that didn't help much. He's uncomfortably wet, and vaguely sweaty. If he didn't know better, he'd think he was in Heat.

Now, that thought gets him panicking.

Steve fumbles with his phone, calling Darcy after a minute, breaths shortening and heart picking up. She sounds distracted when she answers.

"Hey, big bear. What's up?"

He can't help the whine that leaves his lips. "Darcy- something's-" He swallows hard, hand pressing against his skin under his shirt, wishing he could feel his baby move. "Somethings wrong."

Steve has her full attention, then. "Steve, what is it? I'll be up in thirty seconds."

"It feels-" He's starting to cry again, panic setting in. "It feels like I'm going into Heat. Darcy- I can't- I can't go into Heat- I can't lose-" The lump in his throat almost keeps him from saying it. "I can't l-lose my baby."

Darcy is running, Steve can hear it in her voice. "I'm going to be there in two minutes, big bear. Don't panic. It's okay. It's okay. Take deep breaths for me, okay? You're not gonna lose your baby, not while I'm still kicking."

Jane is a little more than surprised when Darcy comes bursting into her apartment. "What-"

"Where's Thor?" She's panicking, and Jane's brows crease.

"He's back with Astrid. Darcy, what's-"

"No time!" The Omega is back into the baby's room, nearly sliding and crashing on a toy car. "Hey girly," She smiles at her before turning to Thor. "Gimme your shirt."

"I do not-"

"Don't ask questions! I need it for Steve!" That's all he needs, apparently, pulling the blue fabric over his head and tossing it to her.

"Darcy! What is-"

"I'll tell you over dinner, okay?! FRIDAY, make the elevator go faster!"

Steve is on all fours, rocking slightly as he groans through his tears, trying to stay calm as best he can.

"Steve! Steve, I'm here!" He can hear Darcy burst into his apartment and into his bedroom, darting toward his nightstand. "Where do you keep pseudo-Bucky?"

"Darcy- now's not the time-"

"Shut up and put this in your face," She throws Thor's shirt at him and the scent of an Alpha- even if it's not Bucky- calms him considerably. "Aha!" She's out of breath as she grabs the device, hands it to him. "Pants off. Do your magic with that. You're not gonna lose your baby, big bear, you're just in Pregnancy Heat."

Steve's hands are shaking too badly to get his pants off. He whines Darcy's name.

"Oh my God. You are lucky I love you." She does his button and zipper, tugs off his jeans and leaves them in the closet with him. A nest is good for this. She's glad he's wearing boxers. "I'm gonna- I'll be in the living room. When you're done. This is normal. You're okay. You're not gonna lose your baby."

Darcy alternates between sitting on the couch and pacing the length of Steve's living room for about a half an hour. She's glad the rooms are mostly sound proof.

When Steve joins her, he's got a blanket wrapped around his shoulders, Thor's shirt still held against his face. His eyes are red. Darcy clicks her tongue and holds him close against her chest.

"My baby is okay?"

"Yeah, yeah, Stevie, your baby is okay." She eases him down onto the couch, hands him a cup of tea. "It's called a Pregnancy Heat." She tells him again, strokes blond hair from his eyes. He needs a cut.

"Wanna tell me what that is?"

"Your body can tell Bucky's not around." Darcy motions to the nearly faded bond mark on his neck. "That you don't have a Mate. So it's trying to fix that, put you into a pseudo-Heat so an Alpha will mark you up and claim you."

He nods slowly, looking down at Thor's shirt in his hands. "I feel... Weird. I've never.. You know." He makes a vague motion with his hands. "To anyone's scent but Bucky's."

Darcy kisses his temple. "I can get that. It's okay, though, Steve. You did what you had to. I knew an Alpha's scent would help you out here. See how the Heat's nearly gone? I'll ask Thor for another one when that one stop smelling like him. It should only last a couple days, though."

"You're telling me I'll have to do that again?"

Darcy doesn't take pleasure in telling him yes. "I'm sorry, big bear."

Steve sighs heavily, takes another deep breath from Thor's shirt. "It's okay, I guess. I just- I was so scared. I can't lose my baby."

Darcy smiles sadly at him, kisses his temple. She gives his belly a light tap. There's a softness there that he's only just noticing.

"You're not gonna lose your baby. No baby of yours is gonna give up."

Steve chooses to believe her.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> steve is just trying to come

Darcy brings him tea and light food between waves when she can, but eventually she has to leave to take care of things.

Steve's on his third day of this stupid Pregnancy Heat, a shirt of Thor's clutched in his fingers, pressed at his nose. The dildo isn't quite Bucky, but it's close enough to have him whimpering, keep him sated and in his right mind.

Steve presses the thing inside himself, takes deep breaths with high whines, finger just about to click the switch for the knot.

Apparently, he hadn't heard the window open.

"Oh, discover the joys of toys, did you, baby doll?"

Steve nearly jumps out of his goddamn skin, scrambles up against the headboard, pulls a sheet around himself.

"Woah- woah, Stevie! It's just me!" The intruder puts up his hands defensively when Steve grabs the lamp like he's going to throw it. Now that he listens to it, the sound of that voice nearly makes him burst into tears.

"Buck?"

Bucky grins at him, pulls off his jacket and boots. "I'm here, dolly. Sorry I missed the start of your Heat."

Steve doesn't have time or the right mind set to correct him, moaning as Bucky moves closer, places a warm kiss on his lips.

"I'm here. I got you." He eases Steve back to lie down, fingers roaming over bare thighs. The metal arm clicks quietly.

"Bucky- I-" Steve's heart is racing, his back arching, his mind screaming at him to be taken. The city lights are enough for Steve to make out his features. His hands move to hold Bucky's face, and he sucks in a little breath, ignores the tear that rolls down from the corner of his eye. "I missed you so much."

"You cryin'? Aw, baby," Bucky kisses him again, slower, hands dancing across his sides before moving to undo the belt buckle and button. "I'm gonna take good care of you."

Steve wants it- oh, _fuck_ , he wants Bucky to knot him into next week.

He can't, though, knows his partner needs to know before they take this further. He doesn't say anything, just reaches out to grab his wrist, guide it to his lower belly. There's not much of a change, but Bucky still notices.

"What, you feelin' a little bloated?"

"Buck," Steve tries his best to smile up at him as he shakes his head. "Buck, I got a baby inside me."

The Alpha doesn't move- doesn't blink, doesn't even breathe for several beats. Steve's heart starts to drop. "You're... pregnant?"

Bucky moves his hand a little, thumb stroking the skin underneath. His other hand joins, thumbs moving across slightly raised skin.

"Yeah. Yeah, Bucky, I am. Fifteen weeks tomorrow."

Bucky swallows audibly, glances up at him. "From where I knotted you?"

Steve nods. "Your pup."

The Alpha lets out an astonished little laugh, looks back to his Omega's belly. "I made you go through all this alone."

Steve hushes him, pulls him close to kiss him again. "Not alone. I've got some pretty great friends, after all."

Bucky leans back to sit, pulls Steve into his lap. "None of them can take care of you like I do." He frowns, hands roaming over the expanse of his back. There's some stiffness there he doesn't remember Steve having before.

"You're here now. That's what matters." Nimble fingers move through his dark hair, pulling the tie out so he can do just that.

"I ain't leaving this time." The words are slow, like he has to think on them for a bit. "I won't leave you alone. Not anymore." He looks up at him with a small smile. "I got you."

Steve feels himself start to tear up again.

Bucky leans forward to kiss his shoulder, peppers affections across lightly freckled skin. "We have a baby, Stevie," His hand moves back to his partner's belly, fingers grazing over it. "Hey, little one," He murmurs, and Steve is really, desperately trying not to cry here. "I hope you haven't been giving Mommy too much trouble." Steve can feel the baby flutter. He shutters in response.

"The baby likes your voice, Daddy. Just moved a little." Steve can see how watery his eyes are when they make eye contact again. He gives up on trying to hold back his tears.

"I love you, Stevie. You're not going to have to go through anything else alone. I'm here. I got you." Bucky kisses him slowly before turning his attention back to their pup inside him. "And you. I love you so much," Steve can hear the smile on his voice. "Daddy's gonna be here to watch you grow up, he promises."

Steve thinks his chest might explode with how much he's feeling right now.

Bucky's holding him. 

He's home. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the prodigal son finally returns


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this ones just explicit ok  
> i had a promise to keep<3

Steve falls asleep like that, in Bucky's arms. He sleeps better than he has since the few days after the Heat they shared.

The clock reads 3:17 in the morning when he wakes, moaning at the wetness between his legs and the pulsing in his skin.

He startles for a minute, when he reaches over to grab pseudo-Bucky and is met with a warm body instead. He panics for a second or two before he calms, fingers twisting into the fabric covering Bucky's chest.

" _Alpha_ ," The word is barely above a murmur as he moves to kiss the exposed skin of his neck, straddles him when he grumbles but doesn't wake. In his head, there's a steady loop of 'fuck,' 'claim,' and ' _Bucky_.'

The last is the loudest.

He rocks down against him, bites down on his bottom lip. "Buck- _please_ -"

A warm and a chilled hand are on his thighs after a moment, hum deep in the Alpha's chest. "I could get used to being woken up like this." He murmurs, hands gliding across smooth skin, over strong muscles.

"Please, Buck. Need you."

"You smell like Heat, baby doll." Bucky takes a long breath, pulls him close to nuzzle into the crook of his neck. "Sweeter, though. Is that- is our baby okay?"

Steve grins as he rolls down against him again, hands bracing himself on Bucky's chest. "Yeah. Yeah, they're okay. You been gone too long." His eyes get a certain glint of mischief. "My body is tryin'a find a replacement."

Bucky growls low in his chest. Steve smirks. The little shit knows what he's doing. "No ones gonna take you from me." He brings him close again before flipping him onto his back as easily as he can, rolls his hip down against the blonde's. "My pretty Omega. My Stevie." He sounds more sure of it than when he fucked him in the dark.

Steve could not be wetter than he is in this moment.

"Prove it."

Bucky grins at him. It looks a kind of feral.

Maybe he could get wetter.

The Alpha sits up to pull the fabric of the dirty red shirt off his chest. The scars are enough to give Steve pause, but then his pants are gone and Steve _moans_. He's so much better than the dildo, and he's not even inside him yet.

"Like what you see, huh?"

"Oh my God, you're ridiculous." Steve chuckles, hands reaching to hold him, bring him close and kiss him hard. "I love you. Shut up and get inside me."

Bucky, apparently just as touched-starved as he is, simply nods. Their lips brush together, and he lets out a breathy noise.

Steve spreads his legs a little farther, back arching up against the other when his hands move against his inner thighs. "God, you're fucking beautiful," He kisses across his skin, latches on with a kiss to his bonding point before pressing into him. Steve feels the wavering breath against his skin, the sound he makes is as though he's been punched. The Omega can only whine, holding onto his shoulders as he tilts his head back, throat bared for his Alpha.

They settle like that for a moment before Steve makes an impatient noise, tells him to move. Bucky bites down on his bonding point when he does- not enough to pierce the skin, just to tease. Steve feels his eyes roll back into his head.

He falls into a mess of whines and whimpers, begs and pleas, needing Bucky's knot, a claim on his neck. A Bond to sate his nerves.

A big hand soothes over his chest, takes a pec in his hand, runs his thumb over the hardening skin. "You still got the best tits in Brooklyn, too. No contest, baby."

Steve isn't sure how he can from coherent thought at a time like this. Maybe because he's not in Heat, he considers. "Yours," It's all he can manage, word given a punch of breath as Bucky fucks into him. "Please- Buck- your knot- claim me," He grabs the metal hand, holds it in his own. Twines their fingers together. It's a part of him, and he loves it like any other. "Need it,"

He remembers being in a position rough similar to this and yet not even close, when Bucky was using the hand to beat him, try and finish his mission. And now he's using it to love Steve, keep him grounded.

They both prefer this.

The Alpha places another kiss to his bonding point, hand moving from his nipple to stroke his leaking cock between them. The motion of his hand only struggles for a few moments before it meets the pace of his thrusts.

Steve lets out a sharp cry. "Oh- fuck!" He whines, knows he's leaving deep red marks in Bucky's skin. "I love you. I love you so much- Bucky!" He doesn't want to come yet, but he knows he's unbearably close.

Bucky groans into his throat, teeth scraping against pale skin. " _My Stevie_." And with that, he clamps down on the old scar, reopens their Bond.

They come together. Steve draws in a lungful of air. Bucky's knot starts to lock them together.

He runs a tongue over his teeth when he pulls away, swipes at the drop of blood on Steve's skin with his thumb before reaching over to grab a tissue. Steve notices his right hand is trembling.

"I-" He struggles with words, wrestles with them for a moment. "I'm with you. End of the line."

Steve grins up at him so brightly, Bucky swears it lights up the room. "'Till the end of the line, Buck."

His Alpha leans back to kiss him again, thumb trailing along Steve's mess on his chest with his thumb, licks it off before placing kisses across his skin. "Sweetest Omega in the whole wide world," Steve can feel him smile. "No doubt about it."


	13. Chapter 13

Steve wakes before Bucky the next morning, curled in his chest. The soreness on his neck and in his ass are a pleasant reminder of the previous night's events.  
He lifts his head to check the clock, figures he still had a couple hours before anyone expects to hear from him  
Apparently, Darcy is an exception. "Big bear? You feelin' better? Doesn't smell so... Heat in here anymore." He can hear her on the other side of the door.  
Bucky's grip suddenly tightens around him, holds him close with a slight growl in his chest.  
Steve wants to kiss him stupid and smack him upside the head at the same time.  
"I'm not... I'm still not feeling so hot," He searches for an excuse, comes up with just about nothing. "I think this might be the last day," He says, and he watches Bucky smile sleepily, eyes unopened. "But I'm kind've... In the middle of something,"  
"Oh! Oh. Yeah. Yeah, yessir, I'm leaving. I brought you some Thai food. Okay. I love you. Bye."  
"I love you too, Darcy." Steve chuckles, hears her close his front door and leave.  
Bucky finally cracks open an eye, lazy smile lingering on his lips. "Nice dodge, punk."  
"Why, thank you very much, j-" The smell of the Thai finally hits him. He's up and fleeing to the bathroom in an instant, emptying the scarce content of his stomach into the toilet.  
His groan is shaky as he sits there, and it's not long before Bucky is stroking his back.  
"You know, I love Thai," He murmurs, hand in his hair, elbow propped on the toilet. "This baby is making my favorite things awful."  
He hears Bucky chuckle, feels him give his shoulder a light kiss. "I'm sorry, doll baby. You can have all the Thai food you want after you have the baby."  
Steve is surprised Bucky is taking this so well, honestly. He'd panicked for days about the whole situation, but Bucky was taking it in stride.  
Maybe it's because he wasn't alone anymore.  
"Doesn't mean it doesn't suck now." He pulls himself off of the floor, flushes the toilet before going to brush his teeth. Bucky kisses at his shoulder, arms around him, hands on his belly, thumbs stroking the slight swell there.  
"You're so pretty. You know that?"  
Steve lifts an eyebrow, looks at him through the mirror. He spits the toothpaste into the sink, rinses out his mouth. "Had to say that when I was covered in toothpaste, huh?"  
Bucky grins. "You're pretty no matter what."  
"Shut up. Just wait 'till I'm all big and I've got swollen ankles and shit. Gonna wish you were still a free man."  
Bucky snorts, kisses the back of his neck before spinning him around, kissing him slowly, letting it linger. "You're still gonna be the most beautiful person in all of Brooklyn. Arguably the world."  
Steve just grins, wraps his arms around Bucky's neck. "You know, flattery will get you everywhere, Mr. Barnes,"  
"I already put a baby inside of you. How much further can I get?"  
Steve rolls his eyes before leaning forward to kiss him again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is the shortest filler chapter im so sorry  
> it's also a cry for help because im totally out of ideas that don't call for major time skips  
> writers block is real  
> so  
> if  
> you have any ideas  
> drop 'em in the comments below pls !!!


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A little something to get the creative juices flowing again.

The improvised table is just as uncomfortable as last time.

But Bucky's here. That makes it better.

He's holding his hand, leaning his head against him, still desperate for any contact.

Bruce doesn't seem too phased by the idea of Bucky and what he's done. He's just one of Steve's friends. Well. More than that, really.

He shakes his hand with a smile, doesn't seem phased with Bucky's tight smile and his simple grunt in return.

He turns to Steve, though, raises one eyebrow. "The one who goes green and loses his shit all over the place, destroys cities?"

Steve slaps his chest. "Bruce is a good man. Don't upset him and we're fine."

Bruce snorts a laugh at the conversation.

The lube is still cold. He doesn't flinch, though, bites his lip as he watches Bucky's face. He wants to see his reaction the first time he sees their baby.

Bucky stops breathing with the pause of the wand, and Steve sees his jaw flutter.

Steve glances to the screen and gives a little noise. There's the clear outline of a head and a little body. He's gonna cry. Again.

"Look at the little alien," Bucky purrs, bends to nuzzle Steve's face with a grin. "Stevie, there's a baby in you," He strokes his hair, glances between his Omega and his baby on the screen. "I'm gonna keep you safe. I promise. Both of you." He promises, kisses the corner of his mouth.

There's a silent 'even from myself' he knows Steve doesn't need to hear.

The blond gives a quiet cry, holds Bucky where he can reach him. "You're gonna be the best Daddy,"

Bucky rolls his eyes. "You'll be an even better Ma."

Bruce prints the picture for them, and the pair of them get back up to the apartment unnoticed.

Neither of them can think of a safer or more dangerous place to have a baby.

He sits on Bucky's lap on the couch, lets him touch the firm skin of his stomach.

There's no bump yet. He doesn't know if he'll get very big, being mostly muscle.

Bucky nuzzles at the spot behind his ear, and Steve can't stop smiling. He's texted Darcy explaining the situation, but asking for some privacy. He needs some time to talk with Bucky.

The blinds are shut. One lamp is on. Bucky is scared of the windows in the day. He knows danger will come if someone were to see him. He can't let anyone hurt them.

"Stevie?"

"Yeah, honey?" He can't stop looking at the print of the ultrasound.

"I want to be here. Don't get me wrong. I want to make you happy, I want you two safe. But.."

"Are you scared?"

"What?"

Steve chuckles softly, rests his head on Bucky's shoulder. "I'm scared to death. I'm not really cut out for this."

"I think I'm scared for legitimate reasons, though, baby doll,"

Steve can't help but smile at the pet name.

"I still black out. I still hurt people without being aware of it. I can't risk that happening around you, or baby."

"I can take care of myself. I can take care of baby."

"The pup has got to come first. No matter what happens, you have to take care of yourself and the pup before me." Bucky doesn't look at him. He's looking at his chest, too ashamed or too scared to look him in the eye.

Steve places the photo on his lap before lifting his hands to angle Bucky's face so he was looking at him. "The safety of our pup will always be first. Know that. But I don't think it will ever come to that, Buck. Just hearing my voice broke 65 years of brainwashing. Plus, you won't beat the hell out of me this time. I've got something to live for."

Bucky's smile drops. He lifts the flesh hand to rest over one of Steve's, concern written all over his face. "Come again?"

Steve sighs, chews on his lip for a moment in thought. "I let you beat the shit out of me in the hellicarrier. I let you. I knew that if the end of the line didn't work, I couldn't save you. I was ready to let your face be the last thing I ever saw."

Bucky chews on this information for a second, Steve can see the cogs turning in his head as he decides what to say.

"Don't you ever," His voice is just above a growl. " _Ever_ say that again." He holds Steve impossibly closer. Steve hushes him, strokes his hair with nimble fingers, using the hand that wasn't being held.

"You didn't kill me. I got better. You've kind've done the exact opposite of it, putting a little life in me. And we're gonna be okay now, just the three of us. And, of course, everyone else on the team. We're kindve one big pack. We're all gonna keep baby safe. From anything." He purrs, nuzzles his jaw, gets his Alpha to calm down.

Bucky knows the anything includes him. He sighs softly, sneaks the metal hand up against Steve's stomach. "Sarah."

"What?"

"If it's a girl," He says quietly, and his breath shakes. "We should name her Sarah. For your Ma. She was a good woman."

Steve bites on his bottom lip to keep it from trembling, and he tries his best to keep from crying. He fails.

"Wait- no- I'm sorry- please don't cry, we don't have to," Bucky falters, and Steve really starts to cry.

"I love it," He sobs quietly, nuzzles into the crook of Bucky's neck. "Little Sarah Barnes," His voice shakes, and Bucky's face lights up.

"Barnes?"

Steve nods, gives another breathy sob. "Of course. You, me, little Sarah. We're gonna be a perfect little Barnes family."

Steve sits there in Bucky's arms for a long moment before he can feel Bucky starts to shake as well.

They sit there just like that for a long while, wrapped in each other, consumed in their own thoughts but surrounded by the same idea.

They'll be parents soon.

A real family.

A shot they'd never had before.


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> bucky meets most of the gang. ok, some

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i added chapter 14 for real, so if you're up to date with it all, i suggest you go back and look. i deleted the note and just shoe horned the chapter in there

Darcy goes well. Really. She brings him a cookie and coffee as peace offerings, and while Bucky doesn't eat the cookie or drink the coffee, he can appreciate the gesture.

"My mate smells more like you than he does me," He muses, nuzzling into blond hair.

Steve knows he's scenting him, he knows it's a show of dominance after a sentence like that. He tries to hide his smile.

Well, I've been around the whole time. Makes sense." She says with a shrug, and Bucky detects a little snip.

He simply hums in response, not wanting to get into an argument right now, or over this."Well I'll be here for the rest."

Steve pokes his chest with his index finger. "You had better be. I'm tired of going at this without you."

Bucky's smile and chuckle in reply is enough to light up a room.

And just like that, Darcy nearly coos, holds her hands on either side of her face. "You guys are disgusting. I love it."

 

Sam certainly.. goes. He's suspicious of Bucky, has been when he was just an idea, let alone someone standing in front of him, a glass of his orange juice on the table in front of him.

Steve circles the top of his glass of water, bites on his cheek. He really doesn't wanna be between the stare off of these two Alphas who obviously care a great deal about him. Never goes well.

"I don't trust you." It's Sam who finally speaks, and Steve lets his head slowly fall onto the table. "I understand it wasn't your choice, but it was your fists pummeling the hell out of my friend. I don't trust you." He sets his glass down on the table, Steve would rather be anywhere but here. "You're gonna have to earn that."

Bucky taps metal fingers against the wooden table before adjusting his hat and leaning forward, just a bit. "I don't owe you shit. Not an explanation, and I don't need your trust. I apologize for, y'know, almost killing you as the soldier, but I don't need you to trust me. I'm only here because Steve wants me to be friendly with your pack."

Sam lifts an eyebrow before tipping his glass at him. "Least you're finally able to speak your mind."

Steve is repeatedly hitting his face against the table now.

The rest of the visit goes smoother, the two of them being knothead as taken care of early on.

They shake hands when they leave, and they say something to one another that Steve can't hear before they leave, Bucky tucked against his Omega so his face is hidden.

"What was that about?"

"Nothing, sweetheart."

Something about his smile makes Steve drop it.

Nat is surprised to see him. That much is evident by the way she simply blinks at him, and Steve can see the cogs turning.

"Natalia,"

She punches him right in the mouth.

"That was for leaving." She goes red in the ears, and Steve was only barely processing what was happening. "Leaving me with those men. And also, for _fucking shooting me_ ,"

"Hey, I don't know if that's-"

"You're right." Bucky interrupts him, and he grins at Natasha with blood on his teeth. "I shouldn't have left. But if I'd stayed they would've killed you to make a show for me."

Steve is utterly baffled by what in the hell is going on here. He sits on one of the bar stools to watch.

"So, I approved you, and I left. I couldn't get close to you. You had too much to do. And I really am sorry about shooting you. You're a big girl, though, you lived."

Nat stares at him for a long moment before she pulls him close with a groan, says something in Russian that Steve doesn't catch. She's happy to see him, that much is evident.

Bucky returns the hug, and they sway for just a minute. He replies to whatever she's just said in the same tongue, and Steve can only smile as he watches the interaction.

They stay for coffee, but both Bucky and Steve get antsy, and Nat smiles as she pats Bucky's back, shakes Steve's hand as they go.

 

Nick Fury is a hard man to find, not that Steve or Bucky had really been looking.

Steve blinks when he opens the door and one Nicholas J. is standing behind it.

He awkwardly invites him in, offers him a drink.

"Please. Where is he?"

Steve makes a motion behind himself toward the bathroom. "He's taking a shower. Just got finished with his workout." The Omega clears his throat awkwardly before setting the drink in front of him. "Here you are."

Before Bucky can even emerge from the shower, Steve opens the door to one Phil Coulson.

"It's like a 2012 reunion in here," He murmurs to himself before smiling, letting him in.

They exchange pleasantries before Phil sits next to Fury.

Steve didn't forgive him for the bloody card thing for a long time. Neither did Phil.

"I got your note," He says, taking off his sunglasses and placing them on the table. "What's this about?"

Fury rubs his eye with one knuckle before tipping his glass toward the hallway, where Bucky has just appeared.

"Oh boy," Steve murmurs, getting himself a tall glass of water.

Coulson blinks at him, and there's a weird, crackling silence in the room. "Oh. The Winter Soldier."

"The arm give it away?" Bucky hums, rubbing a towel through his hair before walking through to the kitchen, giving Steve a quick kiss and moving around to make himself some lunch. He'll be damned if he lets these people disrupt his daily plans. "And, uh, Bucky works just fine. Really."

Coulson clears his throat, shakes his head. He's obviously snapped back into himself. "Ah.."

"We have to assess what kind of a threat you are." Its Fury who speaks. Into his glass more than anything.

"And how, exactly," Bucky is speaking into the fridge as he rummages through it. "Do you plan on doing that? I don't make a habit of killing people anymore. Even when I did, wasn't exactly my preferred line of work. Or did you not read the Hydra files you leaked to the whole world?"

"Of course Rogers' mate is a snarky shit. Of course. It would be utterly fucking ridiculous to expect anything else."

Bucky snorts a laugh, and Steve doesn't try to hide his smile.

Coulson looks visibly uncomfortable.

"Look, I'll tell you anything you wanna know. Okay? But after that.. I dunno. I've got a kid. And a mate. I don't know how much more domestic and soft I can get."

"How are we supposed to know you aren't a sleeper? That there weren't residual effects? That you won't lose your caucasian mind and destroy half the city?"

"I appreciate the terminology," Bucky's making a sandwich now, he's got a smile on his face. "But don't you already have a guy on your team who fits that description? Except he's green."

Fury pauses. He snorts a bitter laugh. "I'm pretty sure we've got at least three." He looks exhausted. More than just physically. Like it's rooted into his very bones.

Steve has chewed the skin off of his inner cheek.

"Look," Bucky leans on the counter, finally looking at the pair of them. "I'll do what I have to. All the files of what happened to me are out there, floating through cyberspace. They've gotten fleshed out a hundred and fifty times across a thousand sources. But I'll do what I can to convince you here."

That seems to sate them.

And they grill him until the sun goes down. Steve has cleaned the kitchen twice, come to Bucky's defense more than once, made his voice known.

But busy hands lead to a busy mind. He can't overthink when he's got busy hands.

"More than likely, when this all comes out- which it will- you'll be given a fair trial." Nick says, on his third drink, with a heavy sigh.

"The files will be beyond helpful for your case, but there will be those who don't care. Who see you as a terrorist that needs to be behind bars." Coulson does his best to put on an empathetic face.

Bucky looks to Steve, he reaches for his hand when he finds him directly behind him.

Steve uses his free hand to squeeze Bucky's shoulder.

"But the people rallied behind Frank Castle," The super soldier swallows. He can't imagine having to visit Bucky in a supervised room. Have him miss his baby's life. "And he knew exactly what he was doing. Knew he was playing judge, jury, and executioner."

"Frank Castle killed mobs, pedophiles, abusers.. Your boyfriend killed JFK and Howard fucking Stark."

"Howard.. And Maria, then?" He feels like he might throw up. He glances to Bucky before shaking his head. "He killed with a choice." He's getting rilled up, Bucky can hear it in his voice. "Frank Castle was aware of what he was doing when he killed people. Bucky would kill for Hydra, and they would toss him back in the ice. He wasn't anything but a /weapon/ for them to use and discard, like- like-"

Bucky stands, strokes Steve's jaw. "Shh, baby, you're getting yourself all worked up,"

Steve realizes now that he's got tears of frustration in his eyes. "I can't let them take you from me," He murmurs, forehead touching Bucky's. His voice shakes.

It's quiet, for just a few beats.

"You don't have much of a choice on this one, Steve." Fury stands, grabs his coat from the armchair. Slides it on with practiced ease as he pulls the collar to hide his face.

Steve's voice is no longer shaking when he says, "We all have a choice."

The look in his eye makes Fury bristle.

"Be careful, Rogers." He stares him down for a moment, hands in his pockets. "You can't be reckless like that any more. Your actions have consequences, and you won't be the only one paying for them any more."

Steve puts a hand over his belly absently.

Bucky's joins it.

He and Coulson leave without much more to say.

It's a lot to think about, and the pair of them don't say too much the rest of the night, wrapped up in one another in their bed.

 

They took a day to discuss what that meant, what would happen if Bucky went to trial. What would happen to them. They didn't really get anywhere.

  
Tony's fiddling with one of his suits, the arm and hand under the precise measures of his screw driver and his other tools.

He looks up with the knock, smiles a bit when he sees Steve.

"Hey, Rogers." He lifts the goggles, sets his equipment down. "What can I do you for? Something to do with nugget?"

Steve smiles brightly, even with his discomfort. Tony has obviously come around, even if just a bit. "Did you just call my baby nugget?"

"What? I think it's a good suggestion. Nugget Rogers. Got a nice ring."

Steve rolls baby blues. It's nice to have easy conversation with him. He knows shit's about to hit the fan.

"If I tell you something, can you maybe not lose your shit?"

"Mm, no promises, Steven. But I'll do my best. Scout's honor."

Steve has to take it for what it is. He sits across from him at the work bench, chews on his cheek.

"You good? Need something to drink, or..?"

"Your parents. How did you lose them?"

Tony registers the question slowly.

"That was harsh. Ah, shit, I didn't mean-"

"We're both orphans, Rogers, it's fine." He wipes his hands on a towel he pulls from his waistband. "Car crash. I was seventeen, roundabouts."

Steve swallows, nods. Fury didn't tell him, then. "Lost my father overseas. Mom got sick. 'S kinda funny how I followed him right over after that, huh?"

"Kids do become their parents. You fared a little better, though, I see."

Steve nods. He clears his throat. "Listen, Tony... Fury paid me a visit. Day before yesterday." He tries not to appear too uncomfortable. "Your parents.. They weren't killed in some random car crash."

Tony pauses, doesn't look up from what he's doing. "And how would he know that?"

"The, uh.. The information from Hydra."

Tony taps his finger against the table, and the dull nail makes a soft ticking sound against the metal. "Right."

It's a strange silence between them as Tony swallows this.

"Did he ask you to tell me this?"

Steve shakes his head. "I needed you to know. It seemed only right you know what really happened. It's not right to keep that kind of information from a person."

"Y'know, I didn't go to the funeral."

Oh boy.

"I couldn't. It was closed casket. But I couldn't even think about my Mamá in there."

"I know the feeling." Steve empathizes with a small, kind smile. "I threw up for three days at the idea of it. Seeing it put me through hell."

Tony nods, looks down at his hands in his lap. "I still go visit. Leave flowers. Do something special on Día de los Meurtos. That and Christmas were always her favorites." He shrugs, obviously not used to actually talking about this.

"Christmas was my Ma's favorite, too. She was Irish catholic. Went all out, even if we couldn't really afford anything for each other. She would scrounge up enough money through the months before the make mince meat pie for dinner, apple for dessert. She did her best with what she had. I miss her."

"I get it. My Mamá was Roman Catholic. My dad was pretty atheistic, but he always let my mom drag us to mass on Christmas." Tony laughs, runs a hand through dark hair. "I always _hated_ it. I got so bored. I thought there were a million better things I could be doing than praying for hours on end." He shakes his head takes a deep breath. "The things you wouldn't give for one more Sunday at mass, huh?"

Steve smiles sadly and nods in agreement.

"Look, Steve.. I know you wouldn't have come unless you felt guilty. You would've had Coulson come tell me or something."  
Steve goes to say something, but Tony holds up his hand. "It was Bucky, wasn't it?"

Steve stares at him for a beat before nodding. "Yeah. It was."

"Hydra's orders, hm?"

"Yeah." A pause. "It was."

"Not every day you learn your parents were assassinated. By your friend's boyfriend no less."

"I'm sorry, Tony.."

"My dad was a douche. Someone would've gotten to him even if Hydra hadn't." Tony licks his lips.

Steve thinks, not for the first time, that he's got almost nothing of Howard. His smarts. Ambition. The shape of his eyes. The rest must be Maria.

"I just don't get why my Mamá. She never hurt anyone. She was a good woman. Set Dad straight when she could. Always stepped in front of me when Dad had too much to drink.. I don't get it."

Steve doesn't know what to say. He walks around the table, wraps an arm around him.

Even if he doesn't like a lot of he things Tony does.. He's still human. And he still needs a comforting touch every now and then. Plus, Omegas gotta stick together. No one else is going to stick up for you.

"I'm sorry, Tony. She sounds like a lovely woman."

He's crying. Steve holds him a little closer.

"Sarah sounded pretty great by the way you talk about her. I used to be your number one fan, I read up a lot on your history. For a single, Omega mother in the twenties.. She did pretty okay raising you."

Steve nods, his smile growing just slightly. "Yeah. She did. And Howard didn't fuck you up too bad, so I guess Maria did a pretty great job after all."

Tony laughs, rubs at his eyes with the heels of his palms. "God, you stink. All... Pregnant, and smothered by Bucky."

It's Steve's turn to be surprised.

"Oh yeah. I know. Nothing happens in the buildings I own that I don't know about. That includes Bucky climbing two floors and crawling in through your window like we're in a goddamn Nicholas Sparks novel."

Steve laughs, and Tony nudges him with his elbow.

Maybe he was warming up faster and better than what Steve was giving him credit for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i had a lot of trouble with formatting here, apologies if it looks weird


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> pure, unadulterated fluff

Steve is losing his mind here. He just had it.

Bucky is watching him as he tears the living room apart, a small smile on his face as his Omega grumbles quietly to himself. "Honey?"

"Shut up. It's right there," He murmurs, lightly smacking his fingers against his forehead, obviously trying to remember something. 

"Can't I-"

"Shhp!" Steve hushed him before groaning aloud and setting back to it. "Up. I need under you."

Bucky, in no position to argue, moves to the arm chair he's taken a liking to. Steve's already checked there for whatever he's looking for. 

"Goddammit! Where is it?!" He throws the couch cushion back, tapping his foot as he crosses his arms. 

"Baby, what are you-"

"I used to be such a damn steel trap!" Steve complains, giving the room one last go around. 

"Baby. Stevie. What are you looking for?"

"My pencil! I was just drawing with it a minute ago, and now I can't find it anywhere!"

Bucky laughs, covering his face with one hand. "Sweetheart, come here."

"Stop laughing at me." But he's walking toward him, and straddles his lap. 

"I'm not laughing at you. With you. You wanna see a magic trick?"

"If you've had my pencil this whole time-"

Bucky pulls the pencil from behind his ear, and Steve flushes all the way down.

"Been there the whole time?" 

Bucky laughs as he nods, strokes Steve's cheeks with strong fingers. "I was trying to get your attention." 

Steve groans, takes the pencil and tosses it onto the table. "I don't even wanna draw anymore." He grumbles into Bucky's neck, sighing quietly. "I feel like I've been working on that piece for seventeen years."

Bucky flinches. It's a slight jerk of the muscles in his face. He doesn't know why, and Steve doesn't notice. He thinks maybe it was just a twitch. 

"It's this piece for a charity auction, but I can't focus on it. And my back _hurts_ all the time now. It's distracting, not to mention a hundred other things I have to do." He sighs again and strong hands move over his thighs, under his shirt to graze over the pale, freckled skin on his lower back. 

"Here?"

Steve gives an affirmative hum, one of his arms draped over the opposite shoulder of where his face was tucked. 

"Let me take care of you," 

Steve makes a quiet noise with Bucky's fingers pushing against the taut muscle, rubbing carefully. Like he knows his own strength, and he's scared of it.  
"Buck- please," 

"Shh," Bucky hushes him, slowly and carefully increasing the pressure. "Tell me if it's too much."  
Steve bites his bottom lip before nodding. "I promise."

The blond is practically drooling after just a few minutes, a groaning pile of super soldier goo in his Alpha's lap. 

"Feeling better?" 

Steve groans an affirmative reply, finding himself incapable of coherent speech. 

Bucky laughs, kisses his hair as he grazes his hands over his back affectionately. 

"You used to be small. I could feel every notch of your spine." 

Steve nods, Bucky continues. 

"The light would make these pretty shadows. I always thought everything about you was pretty. Especially the things you hated." He smiles a little brighter, looks to the celling as he remembers.  
"You would lie on your back. The city lights would put these accenting shadows on the divots between your ribs. I must've kissed you a thousand times there."

"You loved kissing me wherever you could reach."  
There's a bit of a slur, and Bucky laughs softly because of it. He figured Steve would be whining for a nap soon. Pregnancy was weird, and he's been back for just a few days. 

"I still do." He drives his point home by leaning forward to kiss his shoulder, and Steve grins like the sun. 

"Big fucking sap. I love you."

"I love you, too, baby."

Bucky smiles gently at his Omega, still strokes his back affectionately. "You've always been it for me."

"Hm?"

"Even before we presented, I wanted to be yours. Your Alpha, your Omega, even your Beta if my body so chose. That didn't matter." He drops his voice to a low, rumbling purr here. "You've always been my best girl."

Steve grins- Bucky can feel it against his skin. "You know it. And I always will be. Unless baby is a girl."

"I can have more than one best girl. In two entirely different contexts," Bucky nuzzles into his hair. He smells so good. 

"And if they're a boy, you'll finally have a best guy."

"Now wouldn't that be something." Bucky muses, looks to the ceiling. "How would you feel about Grant?"

"What?"

"The baby. If it's a boy. Naming it Grant."

Steve takes a minute to swallow this, considers it for a long while. "I dunno. Maybe. How about a junior? James Buchanan Barnes the second."

Bucky barks a laugh, then shakes his head. "Baby, no," He's still laughing as he gives him a tight squeeze. "No. That's so bad."

"Whatever you say, Papa Bear." Steve hums before yawning. 

Bucky loves to be right. 

"Mm, 's nap time.."

Bucky picks him up easily, hands on his thighs. "Just think. Eventually we'll be taking Baby Barnes to bed just like that." 

Steve gives a long "Aw, Bucky!" He hugs a little tighter around his neck. "I can't wait. You're gonna be so good."

"That remains to be seen. But you're cute."  
Bucky kicks the door closed before laying Steve on the bed. He curls against him, pulling the blanket close. 

They talk for a few more minutes before Steve dozes off, and Bucky watches him with a soft smile for some time. 

He loves him. 

He's scared to death. He has no idea what he's doing. He barely knows who he is. 

He knows he loves him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 17K WORDS!!! NICE!


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> most of this is snippets from steve and bucky discovering pregnancy books, the last bit is steve's first weird craving

Darcy gives him a few baby books she couldn't help but pick up. She told Steve they were on her shelf in her office just in case, but he knows her better. 

He and Bucky spend the next three days huddled up with several pregnancy books on the couch. 

"This one starts by saying 'my partner is over 50, is that a problem?' And I just wanna point out that that's hilarious in our case."

Bucky snorts, nudges him with his elbow. 

-

"Ew!"

"What?" Steve peeks, since Bucky's head is in his lap and the book is on his chest. 

"I dunno why, i just never thought about baby having fingernails?"

"Oh yeah. It weirded me out at first. Baby's fingernails should be fully developed by now. Week sixteen. Big four months."

"Stevie, that's crazy," He marks the book with his finger before turning his head, giving his belly a kiss. "I love you and your horrifying fingernails," He murmurs.

Steve tears up as he strokes his hair. 

-

"Jesus Christ, Steve, the baby pees about a liter a day."

"What? Nu-uh. Lemme see." Steve snatches the book from him, reads where Bucky is pointing out. 

"And the baby drinks it!"

Steve cringes, face twisting up. "Ew. Bucky. That's so gross." He shudders as he hands him back the book. 

"Pal, I'm learning pregnancy is fuckin' nasty."

"Don't you 'pal' me, old man, I've got your baby in me."

"Hilarious."

-

On the second day, Steve gets a pretty bad nosebleed. Bucky is fixing him up, grinning down at him. "Certainly feels like old times."

"Shut up." Steve can't laugh, knowing he'll spray blood everywhere. He smiles, though. "The book said bloody gums and noses were pretty normal."

"Please don't bleed from too many places at once, Stevie, I feel like that's bad." Bucky hums as he pulls the bloodied shirt off, helps one that he's scented onto him. He knows Steve can do it by himself. It makes him feel better knowing he isn't useless to him anymore, though. 

"Now I feel like I gotta out of spite."

"Shut up," Bucky quips with a snort of a laugh, kisses his forehead before they snuggle down again. 

-

"It says here the longest pregnancy on record was over a year. James Buchanan, if I am pregnant for one second past my due date, I will kick your ass myself. Seriously."

Bucky looks over his shoulder this time, reads that passage. "Stevie, I feel like maybe you shouldn't say that out loud. Baby might get ideas and come late. I promise, I'll rub your back as long as you need me to."

"I mean it. 36 weeks, I'm out. I'm done. I can't handle this for any more than that." Steve is less than half way teasing right now. He'll let their baby come when they're ready. As long as that isn't early. 

"You're a fighter. You can take it." Bucky kisses the top of his head. 

Steve smiles as he nuzzles up. "You always know what to say."

Later, Bucky learns what a mucous plug is. 

"Steve, baby, I love you, but that's fucking gross."

"What the hell is that? Give me this." Steve marks his own book before grabbing Bucky's, reading about this so-called mucous plug. "Oh my God. Oh my god, Bucky," He kicks the other books off the bed, tosses this one onto the chair into the corner of the room. "I don't wanna read any more gross facts. I just wanna be blissfully ignorant and leave it at that."

Bucky snorts out a laugh as he kisses his forehead and wraps his arms around him. "You're such a baby."

"I like it better when you call me doll baby," Steve's words are muffled in Bucky's chest, and the Alpha really can't help but be more in love with every single thing Steve does. 

"Of course, doll baby."

Steve's hum of content vibrates against his chest. He's apparently over the disgusting facts already. 

They fall asleep like that soon after. 

Bucky often wakes in the middle of the night for little to no reason. Sometimes it's more dramatic with screaming or a cold sweat. Sometimes sleepwalking, sometimes he's broken something or grabbed the gun and shot into the wall a few times. Luckily, he hasn't done that last one since he's been home. 

On the nights he doesn't wake with a nightmare as previously described, he chalks it up to being a light sleeper. Restless. He reaches out for Steve without opening his eyes. They fly open when he's met with nothing but chilled sheets. 

"Baby?" He sits up, looks around the room as his eyes adjust. The soldier walks out of their bedroom after failing to find him within. He checks the bathroom, but there's nothing. 

He finds him on the couch, watching a video on his phone. 

"Sweetheart. It's three in the morning." He murmurs from the doorway, barefoot and shirtless with his arms crossed. Steve keeps it cold in the apartment. He usually doesn't mind, but he's just crawled from a warm bed. 

Steve looks up from his phone with a spoon in his mouth, which he smiles sheepishly around before pulling out of his mouth. "Sorry. I'm a light sleeper anyway. Baby kept squiggling, guess they were hungry." He says, tapping the bowl with his spoon. 

Bucky nods slowly, looks down at the contents of the bowl. His brow furrows. "Stevie.."

"Hm?"

"What in the name of God are you eating."

Even in the dim light of his phone and that which seeps through the blinds, Bucky can see him flush. 

"Please don't laugh at me. Call it a weird pregnancy craving."

Bucky lifts one unruly eyebrow as he looks at him. "What is it?"

"It's, um. Chopped onion. With mustard. And cayenne pepper."

Bucky blinks at him slowly, apparently processing what he just said. They stare each other down for a long moment before Bucky climbs over the loveseat to curl up against his side. He pulls the blanket from the back of the couch. "What are you watching?"

"The news. You know how I am." Steve can't hide his smile. 

Bucky doesn't comment on the smell. He wants to. Really. He keeps it to himself. Seeing Steve content is enough of a reason to leave him be. 

He's also worried the Omega might start to cry if he picked on him. These hormones were doing a number on him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yes, that's a real weird craving i've encountered from a pregnant person in real life
> 
> also, i'm thinking about doing a bit of a skip after the next chapter, would that be alright with y'all?


	18. note of confusion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> hey y'all

hey y'all i'm sorry if you got excited for a new chapter and this is a huge let down but like i'm definitely thinking about it again!!  
i have several ideas for a new chapter, the most prevelant of which being a trial for bucky??? maybe?? if i can figure it out  
but ye old writer of fan fiction has no idea how the legal system works  
so. like. if anyone could give me a hand in this, the next few chapters could be greatly expedited !!

but if you have any ideas not pertaining to a trial, i would so so appreciate it


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